Everybody Runs

So, I'm watching myself pull apart my own happiness…

I'm pulling apart 'bear' as usual, to find faults. Reasons to run away.

How absolutely fucked is it that the only faults I can find are his looks. And even then the faults are honestly limited to his fucking hair colour. YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME! Seriously! He's not a bloody male model! But he's still a good looking, masculine guy! With a great personality, who makes me laugh, makes me feel feminine, makes me feel like a real person! Someone that actually seems to like me for me! And here I am, literally less than a month after meeting the guy, pushing him the fuck away.

So then, I start bitching about the fact he could be using me. So could any guy retard! But you'll never find out if you don’t give them a chance! Why am I so bloody scared of trusting someone? Of letting myself go? Of sharing my time and myself with someone? Why is it all so fucking hard?

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Anger...